I still miss Mama!
No matter how old you may be, every mother’s day you would look out for things to buy for your mother on Mother’s day. Right? Its’ been 6 years since I last bought a gift for Mama. She would always look forward to Mother’s day because she knows that she doesn’t have to cook on that day. Adik-adik and I would sometimes make breakfast in bed. At the time, burnt toast n watery scrambled eggs seemed scrumptious!
We don’t make toast anymore. Mama is in heaven now. My heart still aches for Mama. I hate that she’s not around to nag me to clean my room. I hate that she’s not around to glare at me when I feed the children chocolate at night. I hate that she’s not around to disapprove of my taste in clothes. I hate that she’s not around to frown when my children colour her walls with crayola. But most of all I hate that she’s not around to hug me when I don’t have the answers to everything. I hate that I can’t cry on her shoulder whenever my husband and I fight. I hate that she’s not around to hold my hand and tell me everything will be alright.
I miss Mama dearly. I visit her every so often. I still talk to her. Ask her questions I’m likely to know the answer because she taught me so. I bitch about how bad some days are, only to pick myself up again because I know exactly what she would say to make me feel better.
As I sit here opening the gift my children made me for Mother’s Day; I’m trying really hard to recollect what Mama would say to my life right now. I can think of a few major topics that she would roll over… Hah!
1. How I raise my children
2. How I earn more blessedly
3. How I live in a more Islamic way
I guess I will slowly hatch these topics and write about them next.
By the way, do you wanna know what my gorgeous children got me for Mother’s Day?